Ok Aunt flow showed up again. Now I am going to test twice a day every day until I find that LH surge. The RE said if you have a regular period 90% of the time you ovulate. I am banking on this theory. I have bought the cheap ovulation kits from Amazon. I got a bundle of 50. I also bought 50 Dixie cups to collect my sample.

I am praying I can locate it. I don’t need any more drama. I am holding off on anymore testing until the New Year. I don’t want to start paying a deductible to have to pay it again. Also open enrollment is coming up and I can get the best insurance. I think I picked the middle of the road insurance this year.  When I was picking my insurance plan I had no idea I would be on this baby journey.  It wasn’t even a thought in my mind. Now it is all I think about. Not all but it takes up a lot of brain space.

I also know there are things I need to be working on. Such as the novel that has been in my computer for over a year. Yes the outline is done. I haven’t touched it and still have many chapters to work on. The blanket I was making for a friend’s daughter. This blanket has been in a corner for over a year. I feel bad every time I look at it. I am trying to get motivated, in all aspects of my life.  Wish me luck!!!


Backwards Lottery

It is so funny when I ask someone what they would do if they won the lottery. Then I ask do they play and they say “NO”. I think it is comical.  They don’t put in the ring but fantasize about winning. I put my hat in and enjoy fantasizing.

The way I play the lottery people find strange.  I play the big lottery at work for several reasons. First being if they win and I didn’t put in my two dollars I would be ready to slit my wrists. Second it is a shot in hell to win that thing. Occasionally I play on my own but rarely.

I do play scratch tickets. In my logic I have a better chance of winning. Scratch tickets are only for the state I am in. Using my C- in statistics I have a better chance of winning. I have won up to five hundred dollars. Not the big pay day I was looking for, but extra money is always a plus.

Years ago my aunt told me to look online to see if all the top prizes have been claimed. You could be buying scratch tickets that you have no chance to win because all the top prizes have been dished out. So I look at the website and see which game has the most chances to win the top prizes.

The strange part is I usually don’t scratch them for several months. No one understands my logic with this. I wait until I have a bad day. Then I scratch a ticket. It could turn my frown upside down. Last night the boyfriend wanted me to scratch my tickets. We fantasized about what we would do if I won the five million dollar grand prize. I still didn’t scratch it. I was having a pretty good day. He was a little disappointed but hey it is my ticket.

Well the fantasy involved me getting IVF and being a stay at home mom. While he change careers and becomes a math teacher. All sounded good to me. Winning ticket here I come!!!!

Medical Fraud

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Now I know firsthand why health care cost is outrages.  I received a bill this past weekend from a lab. It had tests on there I had no idea were done. My insurance company was not covering the full cost. I totally understood their judgment due to the fact I had those test during my annual appointment. Which the doctor had my medical records in front of him.

I called the doctor’s office first thing Monday morning. I finally got to talk to the doctor later in the day. I received a whole lot of double talk. He also said “if the test came out positive, I wouldn’t be arguing with him”. I was beyond insulted. During the visit he seemed like a very nice man. Talking to him as a disgruntled patient he sounded like a totally con artist. He is lining his pockets with health insurance dollars.

I didn’t even bother with him. I immediately called my insurance company. He is a doctor on their list, so they have some responsibility for this also. Or at least know the crap the doctor’s are doing they are referring people too. They advised me to write an appeal.  I faxed it first thing this morning. I put in every detail of his unnecessary testing. I am going to check back on Friday to make sure there got it.

His nice friendly demeanor in the office, turned into slick Rick trying to make a buck very quickly. I understand the economy is affecting everyone.  I understand because it is affecting my pockets also. He messed with the wrong consumer.

Acupuncture, My second visit

The stress of life was getting to me.  I needed to relax. I decided today was a great day for my second visit. I am glad they have walk in appointment.

This time I couldn’t control it. I fell asleep on the table. I have no idea when that happened. The pins were stuck in. I felt a few more than the last time. He came in out of the room several times. One of his exists from the room I was out like a light. He came back in and woke me. I was so shocked I fell asleep. I was beyond relaxed. The next step was the heat around my feet. Then last but, not lest the ultimate backrub. He used the hot rocks again.

I have to say a successful appointment. I told her I have no idea if I was pregnant or not. So I was given more herbs to take. I know there are great benefits that come with acupuncture. The pure relaxation is top on my lists of pluses. I have been at many fertility seminars. They all promote acupuncture. They mention the higher success rates with IVF. Fertility clinics have clear cut numbers of the increased success with acupuncture.  That is only because that is their bread and butter.

I have also read circumstances where it has help the infertile achieve pregnancy. I went there solely for that purpose. The benefits so far have out weighted my originally purpose. I was so stressed yesterday. There were various family and personal issues going on. One big one being I haven’t heard from my boyfriend in three days.  The family issues I don’t even want to get into.

After getting out of the acupuncture I called my aunt. She commented on how great I sounded in comparison to yesterday.  I have to say I do feel a whole lot better. Then the boyfriend called on my way home. I heard every third word. Clearly his cell phone is broken again. I did not get to talk to him but it put my mind in great ease. He didn’t drop off the face of the earth. He didn’t really have a way to contact me. This has happened before. I have no idea where he is, his job drags him across three states. He did make three attempts to get through which all had too much static for me to actually talk to him.

When I left the acupuncture I met a woman who was leaving at the same time. She said she had been coming to this office since 2007. She said she brought her mother to visit who was walking on a cane. After the appointment she walked the entire day without the cane. I was so impressed with her testimonial. I decided I will continue this therapy even after pregnancy.

Unnecessary Test

I don’t understand what is going on in my world lately.  I went to the gynecologist. I spent a painstaking week making sure my medical records to be transferred. I was going for family planning with my next steps of trying to have a baby.

I get to this appointment and was very pissed off with the wait. Then when I am seen by the doctor he tells me all my records were not sent. I was beyond pissed. I made many phone calls to make sure those records were sent. I even called this doctors secretary to make sure he had it. She said yes. I should have known this was about to go badly.

He wanted to do a pap smear. I asked why I already had one. He claimed it didn’t show these cells that he wanted to see. The records that were sent over did have my lab work. Then I asked him if my insurance will pay for it. He says yes because it was because he sees something wrong with the test.

Now weeks later I get a bill from the lab. It includes tests I did not authorize. I also called his office last week because my insurance company said they were not paying for the pap smear.  I receive an email from insurance company when a claim is submitted. It looks like the nurse did a regular annual tests and not just this pap he told me was being done.

I called the woman doing medical billing about the pap issues. After I called my insurance company they said she put it under regular annual codes. If it was done special she needs to put it under that code.  She agreed to resubmit it. It sounded like I was bothering her.

Now on Saturday I get another bill for test I had no idea were being done. Now I have to call them on Monday to deal with this issue. I am hoping it will not be drama and they will deal with it.  If not, I am not taking this crap lying down. I don’t have money just to give away for test I did not ask for.

I left that appointment being told to take my basal temperature for the next three months.  He also wanted me to take a HSG test. I didn’t need to go to him for that.

Where Did These Kids Come From

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I haven’t figured out if I like or hate face book. I guess with my desire to have kids, I started noticing all the people who have children. When did this happen. It looks like everyone has procreate and I didn’t get the memo.

The funny thing is I was never averse to having children. I wanted them, a lot of them actually. I wanted a house full of kids. I am an only child. I grew up with my cousin. It was just him and I always desired a lot of siblings. The fact that I have never been married and do not have children was not my plan. I had a master plan; right after the wedding day I was going to have babies. Now I am ready for kids and if I don’t get married I could care less. Not to say that I would turn away the man of my dreams.

I wish the epiphany came a lot earlier. The boyfriend I have now, I actually dated ten years ago. He was gun hoe about not using protection when we dated before. I was in the hell no mode. Unless you put a ring on it, that was not going to happen.

It is funny how things turn full circle. Our relationship is going ok. He still works a lot. Hopefully in a few months more quality time will happen. We will see. I am trying to take it all as it comes. My fantasies of my life are having a harsh push or reality.

Signing My Life Away

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How the hell do people stay out of debt? I swear credit cards have been a part of my life since 1993. I signed up for a discover card on the first day I was at my college campus. I still have that card. I am sick of owing people. It is a never-ending cycle. As my mother says you will always have bills. Not that she is the best role model. She doesn’t like to pay bills and avoids doing so as best she can. I on the other hand was taught by my grandmother to protect your credit.  I have done this with a vengeance. I do owe people, don’t get that wrong. I always pay, early in fact.

Well my credit cards were getting out of control again. My version of out of control is completely different from others. I took out a consolidation loan over a year ago. I used my credit union which I have been a member of since I was 22. I was excited to know I paid off 3k within this year. Well I was ready to put my present credit card amounts in a new loan. With the debt crisis and the economy the interest rates on my credit cards have gone crazy. I call them to lower the rates. They could careless that I have good credit and thought they were doing me a favor to give me 15%. I remember have 7%. Those days are over. Now they are damn loan sharks. The loan with my credit union is fixed, at a considerable lower rate.

So I called my credit union to do my loan again. They were happy to oblige. They told me I had grade A+ credit. While getting the paper work together I had a knot in my stomach. Will I ever stop this cycle? My debt has been paid off twice in my life time. I seem to be here again. A lot of that has to do with home ownership. One of my Facebook friends wrote home ownership is overrated. Owning my home for the past eight years I would have to agree. I miss calling the office when something was broken in my apartment.   When you have a house something always needs to be done fixed or taken care of.  The need for a functioning car presents a problem. In Boston I could leave the car in the yard if it had issues and take the bus and train. There is nothing I can do here in Georgia without a vehicle.

One day I will have financial security. I feel I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop. That is a major problem. It goes to my negative nature. I need to work on being positive. The laws of attractions need to work in my life. Thinking these negative things, I know is bringing negative things to my life.

Life and all it dramas

air conditioner

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The last week has been beyond crazy. My AC went last Sunday. I grew up in a city with one AC window unit in the whole house.  A city that has old electrical wires.  The unit was in my grandmother’s room. If you were to hot you could always go in there and sleep on the floor. Other than that a fan in the window is what you were left with. It blew hot air and you just survived.

Since I grew up in Massachusetts the summers never lasted too long. Now living in Georgia I have central air. It has made me very spoiled. So when my AC went, I thought I could handle it. Many summers with city heat and a fan I would make it through. Well that went out the window the first night. My dog and I posted up on the couch on the first floor. The thought being that heat rises and it would be cooler. I was sweating my ass off. My dog acted like he couldn’t breathe. I had exactly two hours of sleep. I woke up not only tried, but drenched in sweat. I knew I needed to make other arrangements.

Thank god I have friends. A friend offered her home to my dog and I. Honestly I had many places I could stay. They are not pet friendly. My dog not being totally trained does not make him the greatest house guest. I am a dog owner so I couldn’t leave him in this mess. The kindness of friends saved me this week and I am greatly appreciative. They have a dog also, so my dog was welcomed.

I would have rather stayed at the boyfriend’s house. He was out-of-town all week for work.

Now the issues that came down the pike, first off we had a heat wave. Then my warranty company wanted to take several days to decide what they wanted to do. Now I have had this home warranty for eight years. I cannot fix anything. So yes I pay the absorbent amount yearly to have less drama when it comes to things breaking in my house.

Well I was in customer service hell. Then the boyfriend was asking a lot of technical questions that I had no answers. I was getting angry so I asked him if he wanted to call them himself. I was shocked when he said yes I will call them.

He called and got all his questions answers. Then he immediately called me back and was not happy. His words were “Let me work my magic”.

He found the email address of a VP at my warranty company. This was after four days of dealing with them and their crap. One hour after the email was sent. I received a call from my warranty company. I just got of phone with one of their customer service reps that informed me they wouldn’t get the parts for eight more days.

I was shocked they were now calling me. One hour after the email was sent. Well that email put a fire under someone’s ass. I was informed that it would be handled very quickly. I told the man I just got off the phone with your company and they said eight more days. He said they were wrong and he would handle it. I asked how he came across my information. He said he received my email.

Things moved very fast after that. It was fixed in two days. I have to say I was in boyfriend bliss. This is the first time a man took charge and handled things for me. I enjoyed every minute of it. He felt very bad he wasn’t home so I could have stayed with him this week. He is not a dog person but accepts my five-pound dog. Even thought my dog does not like him at all. He made up for it with emailing the right person. He passed through on the day it was fixed and checked out the work.

Even thought he is not around much he really showed me he cared.