Important Week!!

I will be inseminating this week. I been testing and I swear my emotions have been all over the place. I did go on a three-mile walk yesterday. I pushed myself because my lazy ass was ready to die after the second time around the park. I was impressed with pushing through. Usually not like me. I found this song I am in love with. I usually do not listen to the radio, so I am not up on any of the latest music. Here is the music video.

I have to say I love old school music. When I grew up it wasn’t old. But now that my ass is old it is called old school.

Here is what I am use to listening to:

I didn’t do much this weekend. I did go to acupuncture  I am trying every angle to make this IUI a success. She gave me a tea to drink before I inseminate. I need to cook it up tonight. She doesn’t do tea bags. She puts the dirt, leaves and bark in a brown paper bag. So more dirt tea for me. I have actually been getting use to the taste. I swear I never thought I would say that.  Everything I have done this past 12 months is leading up to this week. Nervous is just part of my emotions. My Co-worker came to my office and said are you ready for this week. I said no thinking she was talking about work. She was referring to my IUI and I did show some excitement.

All this is some scare shit!! All of it. From going through the stress of the IUI working or not. Doing it all alone with no real emotional support. I was feeling lonely this weekend. I don’t have that feeling often. It did consume me a little. No one called all day Saturday. It is funny when you want someone to call the phone doesn’t ring. When you are in a great conversation the phone won’t stop.

I am going to start praying tonight. I need something to ground me. I feel all over the place.

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