My depression is taking over. I am not sure if I need a therapist, antidepressants or Church. I need to do something. I did make a plan to make moves this week. I didn’t do anything. It has been a stressful week. I am putting it on my to-do list for next week.

I decided to check out a church. They have a daycare that will take autistic children. I am not taking Ava until I see this place and feel comfortable leaving her there. I need something because things are not going well. I am not happy and feel really disappointed with life. I feel like I will be fighting forever for everything. Pray for me. I am working things out. I am sure it will get better. I am going to be proactive about finding a solution.


Depression and complaining

I am not a complainer. I have suffered from depression my whole life. Doctors have always said it isn’t bad enough to go on drugs. Which I don’t want to go on drugs. I took them one time and the outcome was crazy. I have enough drugs I have to take for my neurological condition.

So a friend said she had a bone to pick with me. No need to go into all of it. Then I said look I am depressed and have a lot going on in my life. She said to see a therapist. I told her where am I supposed to fit that in. Here are my issues with a therapist. You have to have time for them. Which I don’t. It is hard to find one you like. Not all therapist are equal. I have been to therapist lets say five times in my life. I only had success with one. The woman that was there for me when I had all those miscarriages and thought I would never be a mother. That lady was great.

My friend said why didn’t I say anything to her about my depression. I am not a complainer. Complaining doesn’t get anyone anywhere. I know a few women in my life that will let the complaints fly. Now I there is a difference from sharing the hard things going on in your life to straight up complaining. I have friends I share with. Complaining I don’t do. There is nothing to be gained. What can anyone do about my depression. I can’t do anything about anyone else depression.

I am not a therapist and I actually have a friend finishing a school for therapy. She said we are friends and she can’t be my therapist. I still run things by her. LOLOL.

I remember someone telling me why  complain no one is listening.!!!