Feeling some type of way.

I emailed  my ex. When I get lonely I start looking  up the ghost  of Christmas passed. My baby is sleeping  right next to me.  I am typing  this on my tablet because  turning on a computer  right now just seems like to much trouble. 
He is married. Which annoyed  me.  In a way I am glad he is happy.  On another hand I want a husband.  Not him,  since all we did was fight and he never  seemed to get himself  together. He was sent tall and the sex was great.  That isn’t  the recipe  for long term. He was the biggest  asshole.  We tried to date twice and both times ended badly.  I actually  deleted his number, I emailed him. I also tried  to look up another  ex with no luck.  I guess  that is for the best.  I am feeling blue.  The plumber still likes me but he has a lot going  on. Which  I don’t think I want to be involved  in.
God has answered  my prayers  in  a lot of ways.  I am 208. L
osing 30 pounds has put a big smile  on my face. 43 more pounds  and I will be a cutie pie.  At least  I will be feeling like the old me. Confident  especially with my body. Granted I don’t  have a hard body but I feel  so much better when I am not carrying  a bunch of excess weight.
The plumber might be my next known donor.
On a good note I won on another  scratch ticket. I haven’t  scratch  how much.  I wanted  to fantasy for a while  it was the top prize. I am enjoying  the fantasy then scratching it and finding  out it’s a free ticket.

Home ownership is overatted!

I owned my own home. I was not a big fan of owning. Having to be responsible for everything. So I am back home and they have been putting a new roof on our house for the past three days. My aunt is here saying she is supervising. Which I find funny since she knows nothing about a roof but okay. She is mad the contractor is not here. I told her the contractor sub contracts it out. She is mad he went 3k up on the estimate. Which I would agree with if she didn’t sign the contract and get more involved with it before these men were up on our roof. Basically a man second guess it and now she is pissed. I do understand the feeling of being jilted.

When my door got kicked in I had to get a new door immediately. I know I got taken by the amount and the horrible workmanship. My mother said there was five roofer up here. I have no idea why she picked this guy. There is a lot more work that needs to be done. I pray this doesn’t slow down the process. We need a new bathroom big time. I am going to pray for things to work out. I still don’t want to hear the bullshit. She is on her way here I am sure that is what I am about to hear.

Being a mother is very interesting. I really think it would be different without my mother’s input. I have to suck it up. This is what is best for my little family.  She amazing. She turns over and lifts her head up. She also loves to talk. I know her and when she is tired and needs to sleep. She has her own personality. Mommy is her main girl. Everyone else is second fiddle to me. Which I have to admit I secretly love.  I can’t really leave her on my bed she is moving and grooving. I am not comfortable leaving her on the floor. Especially with this crazy cat lurking. I am feeling there is going to be some crying in the pack n play. While I get a bottle or whatever I have to do. I can’t have her in my arms all the time.

Life is good and I am trying to appreciate it.