Today my breath was crazy. I know it has to do with my intermitting fasting. Also the low carb high fat diet. Or how I like to call it LIFESTYLE Change!!! My stomach is on over drive in the morning. I only drink water until around noon. Today I had to have a low carb yogurt around ten. My breath and stomach couldn’t take it anymore.
The weight is falling off. I am not complaining. I know when I put my mind to something I get it done. When I gained 7 pounds in a week at weight watchers. I knew I had been bullshitting this whole process. It was time for me to put up or shut up.
I only have two more weigh in at weight watchers. Before we have a break and don’t start again until after Labor Day. I need my sexy back in a big way. It will help my confidence and self-esteem!! 8 pounds down in 8 days. WOO HOO!!!
I started a low carb diet. I tend to put more fat in the diet. I will use low-fat things as long as everything is low carb. This because urgent when I gained seven pounds in a week. Which I looked like a fool and totally embarrassed in front of the woman who takes the weight in weight watchers. Was I shocked I could gain that much weight in a week? NO!!!! I can get in my feelings a be a binge eater. I ate everything that week. From Chinese food to random take out, ice cream. I was having food orgasms that gave me a 7-pound weight gain in one week.
The come to Jesus moment. I cannot do the weight watchers diet. I cannot do food in moderation. It isn’t possible. I will never get to my goal weight not knowing who I am. Well, I continue weight watchers. YES!! It is at my job convenient and my job discounts the price. So the main reason I will continue to go is accountability. When I am accountable to myself that shit never works. I can lie to myself and get away with it every day. Sad but the truth.
So with my new Low carb diet, I have been weight myself every day.
July 28 251.6
July 31 247
Aug 1 246.5
Aug 2 246.2
Aug 3 245.2
Aug 5 245.6
Aug 6 244.4
Total weight loss 7.2. My goal is to lose 90 pounds. I want to get my skinny sexy back.
I am praying this is not a fluke. I am nervous to claim the results. It has been less then a week. I have been doing the Low Carb, High Fat diet. Five pound weight loss.
This way of life goes against every diet book I have taken and read. Also the program I was in for a lot of years. I bought a new scale and will be doing updates once a week. I was also going to make video’s about it on my YouTube channel. Which I would have done today. If my child didn’t wake up at 4am. I have been off all day. It is 11pm and I have several things I need to accomplish.
Of course we played the power ball. How can you resist 300+ million dollars. I tried to fantasize with my mother about what we would do with the winnings. Of course she says win the money first. Does she not understand the fun part of playing. The fantasy part is my thing. Of course I do feel a big win is in my future. Do I need 300 million dollars. NO!! Would I turn it away if I won it. Hell no!! I would give a good amount away.
So we will see tomorrow what state won. Or does it rollover to the next time. Ava acted a fool in the mall today. Cried from the moment we got there to the moment we left. I felt she was tired, with us being off schedule. I had to go to Stride Rite to get her foot measured. I realized she had been wearing those shoes for a long time. They were not as easy to get on as they use to be. So of course she needs new ones. I ordered them. She will have them sometime next week. It wasn’t an emergency being she doesn’t really the house much during the week.
Today was a good day. Not much going on, and I am thankful for no snow. If you were in Boston last year during the blizzard you would totally understand that statement.
Thank you, to one of my readers. I am not sure if she wants me to put her out there but thank you. I was lost in a sea of WTF am I going to do about my weight. She reached out to me about the Low carb diet. Which I have to say I am doing better on this. Then I have ever done on my own with anything else.
What messed me up today. Apples, I had two. Which are a no no. I also ate some food off my daughters plate and it all went to hell. I will be trying again tomorrow. Since I bought all these apples. I will be eating them until they are gone. One a day. I did find a Greek Yogurt with 5g Carbs. I love almonds which I had no idea before doing this diet.
I sat on YouTube all day, watching video’s on the Low Carb diet. I am ready to drop these pounds. It is hard as hell to give up Carbs. Then I listened to Oprah bullshit commercial for Weight Watchers. We are in this together, YEAR RIGHT. Oprah has peddled more diet and work out plans I can’t even count them all. I have a feeling weight watchers is not going to be the end of the road for her. She is a freaking billionaire, does she really need Weight Watchers to lose weight. She can have her personal assistance count every calorie that goes in her mouth.
On a better note. I am back to using the Laws of Attraction. I knew I needed to change the script for 2016. Which all started for me years ago when this guy gave me the book Working with the Law by Raymond Holliwell. I started reading it last night. Then I realized someone what the whole book on audio on YouTube. Score, I listened at work and at lunch. It is something about hearing the words that have just captured my spirit.
I know when I was working on those principles, I felt indestructible. I want that back. That inner feeling that you got this!!!
My father is moving and has a deep freezer for me. Which was right on time. I was going to buy one. Even thought Dave and I are having our issues he is going to take his truck and pick it up for me. I have missed him over the past few day. Absence makes the heart grow stronger. I will be strong and will not dial that number unless totally needed. We need a break to reevaluate the situation. More I am giving him time to sweat. We will see what happens. I always felt men are like susses there will be another one in 15 min. I really like Dave so I will see what happens. I am not optimistic. Which is caused from years of bullshit men in my life.
I bought a journal with laws of attraction motivation statements. Hoping it will help me with my attitude. I feel very defeated and depressed. I know this is a illness that just comes on and off in my life. My baby and I had a pajama day today. It was very cold outside. We stayed in our jammies. I watched her play and danced with her. I also discovered she like eggs now and pancakes. Yes I ate those things today. She shared and I realized we can expand her food choices.
A reader has me thinking about a low carb diet. I haven’t looked into as much as I need to. I am so tired and did nothing today. I have several things to work on before I go to bed. Namely these video’s and my online presence. I am trying to make side money with YouTube. Which is not the easiest thing to do. They say make video’s that you are interested in. Which is what I do. I have made some money, not a lot to jump and down about. The truth is I do like helping people The people who have reached out to me is amazing.
I know when I was on the journey, I wanted to talk to someone who had did it all. Help me to avoid many mistakes. It is almost 2016, and I am praying for good things in this upcoming year. I like my new job so far. Not stressed, get to leave on time. The commute sucks, and money could be better. All in all I am very happy. I heard the job I left is a complete mess. I am so glad I am out of there. Now I have some decent health insurance.
My life in Boston is so different from my life in Georgia. I was single doing what every I wanted to do. Now I have to come straight home. I have to take care of someone else besides myself. I am very worried I am not doing the best job I can.
The speech therapist commended me for being proactive. I felt like I should have been doing more. Then I talked to my cousin and she confirmed being a working mother is no joke. Reading a book can be a lot when you got up at 5:30 am. Go to work, get home and have a list of things to do before bed.
I have a love life. Which is so strange. I haven’t had one of those in a real long time. We see each other once or twice a week. I haven’t been to his house yet. He said he will invite me over after the new year. I am not as suspicious as I use to be when I was younger. If it works out it does. If it doesn’t’ it doesn’t. I am really not pressed. Just enjoying the ride as we go along. I wish I had this thought process years ago. Would have spared a bunch of heart ache.