The concept is typically extended to include the attitude of hope for future conditions unfolding as optimal as well.
I really need to work on my optimism. I want to say thank you to a friend who gave me a different perspective yesterday. I could be pregnant now. Only god knows. I am not a religious person. I do believe in god. My spiritual concepts took a long time to come together. I was an agnostic for a long time. I believed god existed. I really thought he did nothing for me. Like Santa Claus skipping my house. It wasn’t until my twenties when I realized a lot of good happened in my life that I did not appreciate. That is when my spiritual side started to unfold.
God has been working in my life for a long time. My concepts is more spiritual than religious. I can not quote any scriptures. I can tell you I believe totally god has my back.
When I moved to Georgia with nothing. My uncle told me I would be back. He insinuated I would fail and come running back home. That did not happen. I moved with my car pulling my stuff in a little U haul box behind my car. Other than to visit I haven’t been back yet.
As my friend reminded me, a year ago I didn’t think any of this would have been possible. My plan was to move to Boston. Find a job than work on having a baby.
Things started to work out.
I did a short sale on my house. It affected my credit, but not a lot. Thank God!!! I stayed with friends and paid off some bills. I received a promotion with a great financial increase. Nothing that could afford IVF, but enough to make me stay in Georgia for a while.
I pray my baby dreams do not go un answered. I know optimism and lack of stress will carry me through. It is so hard not to worry. I wish I could switch that off. I am going to work on it!!!
I am going to karaoke tonight. No singing for me. I am a spectator. I sound great in the shower and in the car by myself. I could be Beyoncé.
In public I sound like a cat that should be put out of her misery. My friend claims she is going to get up there. We will see if I will follow. I am not seeing it right now!!!
I went to my meetup group on Friday night. With it being the holiday weekend the turnout wasn’t that great. I met three new possible friends. One woman suggested we go to a Cowboy club not to far from where we were. We had a great time. We also met at a bar the next night. I met one guy at the cowboy bar. He was nice but we will see if I hear from him. My vacation is about to be over. I have a frown on my face. I want more vacation days. I did make a Santa wish.
I am close to Forty and making a Santa wish. I thought what could it hurt. I did not go to anyone’s house to eat. I stayed home and enjoyed some relaxing time. I will be back to the grind tomorrow.
My coffee date did not happen this weekend. I received a rain check due to a work Christmas party. Men confuse me to the tenth degree. I didn’t hear from him for the entire weekend. Then I check my email on Sunday night and he sent me emails. I am thinking why didn’t you call me. Who sends emails on the weekend to stay in touch. During the week it is cool . I check my email all day at work. I emailed him back and said you could have called. When has picking up the phone become so taboo.
Well with his lack of attention I worked on my new blog. Which took a whole lot longer than anticipated. I swear my bright ideas always sound great until I have to put work into them. Well a new guy hit me up online. He is not actually new. We have talked online a few weeks ago. He asked me via IM if I had any prospects. I told him one which was the coffee date that went bust. He seemed disappointed he was not on my list. I told him he is some random dude online. I haven’t even talked to him on the phone. If he wants to be on the list he needs to get in the game. I received a call that night. I guess he took me seriously about getting in the game. I told him you can’t stand on the sidelines to be a first round draft pick. He is really into sports so he found me hilarious. Either way we talked and text all weekend. He is 28 6’2 and has a cute smile. I am eight years older than this guy. He doesn’t seem to mind so I guess I don’t either. I think I need to be 15 years older to really be a cougar but hey 8 years is a lot of years in my book.
I have no reason not to talk to him. So far so good. He hasn’t been inappropriate in any way and so far seems like a nice guy. I obviously still got it if the youngings are trying to get my attention. I shouldn’t be shocked, I have been told I look young. I don’t see it but hey it is great for the ego. Santa might bring me a cub for Christmas!!!