Itching like I have fleas

Ok, why ME is the question of the day?. I moved up to 300mg of Welburtrin and I broke out into these crazy hives. I started itching my skin so bad. It has been horriable. I have made so many visits to Walgreens to try and find something to stop the itch.

I ended up at urgent care and they gave me a shot of steriods and steroid pack to take at home. I am done with anti-depresants. I email the doctor and told him urgent care told me to stop the pills immediatly. He said to go down to the lower dose. I said hell, not I will not. You can’t keep that bullshit pill.

I will have to admit. That pill was the bomb. I was feeling great. It made me pep up. Not sleepy at all. The after shocks was not worth it. I haven’t been able to sleep for weeks. The only thing that works is Benadryl. I am tired as hell with the Benadryl tirediness. It is either be tired or itch. So I am just tired. I take Benadryl before I go to bed. I wake up five hours later itching. I then have to take some more. This shit is so horrible, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. After a week the itching is subsiding but not gone by any means.

I never really been into to taking to many pharmercicals. I am going to stick to that and have to work through my issues another way.

God help me!!!

Keeping up is hard!!

I am having a hard time keeping up with this blog, my youtube channel. The book I have been writing hasn’t been touched in two months. These are the things I enjoy and I haven’t been doing them.

I can blame that on autism and partly my motivation and depression issues. I love this blog. I kept deciding to move it somewhere on the net where I can get paid. I tried with WordPress but I don’t have the kind of traffic they are looking for.

Expressing my feelings on this blog keeps me sane. So I decided to keep it here and because it does more for me then any check would.

I wish I had more time to work on things I like to do. A few days I just turned everything off and worked on an adult coloring book. Just to distract my mind from negative things. I have run out of topics for my youtube channel. Which has more to do with writing them down when I think of them?

I haven’t kept up with my routines that have kept all the balls in the air. I talked to my doctor about being depressed. I actually broke down and cried in her office. I wasn’t prepared for my own tears. She looked at me with concern and gave me Welbutrin. Which is supposed to help me with this 100 pounds I gained and depression. I have only been on it a few weeks. A very low dose, I was getting headaches daily. That has gone away thank god.

They say it takes a few weeks to feel effects. I am waiting patiently. I need some relief from my brain. Thank God they like me at work and I have no issues there. If that was also a problem I don’t know how I would cope.


I had to argue with a neurological resident. We were in the Children’s Hospital. You see so many residents it is crazy. Each doctor with a neurological background. Pretty much saying the same thing. They have no idea why Ava has seizures other than Autism, and Delay has seizures more than regular folks.

The first doctor said the seizure medicine Keppra had a side effect. It could affect her behavior. I am thinking ok she not going to talk and have an attitude problem. Which sounds like a lot of crying to me.

He told me we will give you B6 to counteract that. I thought great a vitamin can do that. Then the next round of residents leads by a very young Indian woman. She said we will not give her the B6 and see how she reacts to Keppra. I looked that lady down. I don’t think so. You will give me that B6. It is a vitamin.

Does she know how hard it is to guess what is wrong with a nonverbal autistic toddler? She was given me that damn B6. I was not trying to hear that wait and see bullshit.

Ava doesn’t take pills. I had to buy a pill crusher for the B6. Money well spent. I called the autism center to tell them what happened. Also to have them watch out for any behavioral changes.

Next stop Ava nerologist for followup.