19DPO Still nervous!!!

it is 19 days past my ovulation. No period in site. I am happy and nervous. I am cramping. Not allot but it is making me nervous. You go online to see if this is normal. Online searches is the worst thing to ever do. I never seem to find good explanations. Maybe I don’t know how to search.

The very handsome guy who sent me an emailed called. I am not feeling his personality. He seems a little stiff in his conversation. He sounds like an old man and he is only 38. He wants to meet today. I do like that he has some urgency. This week isn’t good for me. So he will have to wait. He also said something about he could not date someone who isn’t hot. WTF does that mean?? So do you need to look like a super model. If that is the case drop my resume from consideration. The truth is looks are so subjective. I am not seeing a great turn out with this one. I am still going on the date.

No real reason not to. He lives close to me, it isn’t taking me out of my way.  Trying to stay positive!!!

Baby Project #49

Second insemination yesterday complete. I was a little worried. He text me he was exhausted. I wanted to say I don’t give a shit, stick to the plan. I know that is ugly, but I can be honest on my blog. He did come through. I haven’t gotten any response from a possible new known donor. So I have to work with what I got for the moment. So now the waiting game is on. I know me and I will be crazy in a few weeks with the first response test. I can lie and say I won’t, but come on!!

I am going to the therapist today. I am a little nervous. She didn’t call to confirm my appointment. We will see if she shows up. I never had a medical appointment not confirmed the day before.

I need to work out my issues. I know everyone has issues, mine just seem a little too much these days. I am so freaking happy I found that damn happy face. I thought my ovulation went to shit.

I remember the doctor telling me she didn’t want me to ovulate early. I usually ovulate on the 10/11 day. She wanted it in there longer to grow.  I might have hit the jackpot. I didn’t get the happy face until the 14 day. So if there is any truth to her theory that might have helped out. I don’t know if the soy isoflavone helped also? I know I am going to keep taking it. I know I felt my ovulation this month. That never happens to me, so hopefully I am doing something right.

I am not sure if I should buy more ovulation predictor kits. I don’t want to be without if I need them next month. Also I need to know the cheap early pregnancy test. If anyone in the blogosphere knows where I can order online,  Please put a link in the comments. It would be much appreciated, because first response can get expensive. Especially with my constant testing.

I still can’t believe I had six positive pregnancy test last month to disappear. The good news is I can get pregnant. Now how do I do it and stay pregnant with a healthy child or children???

 

Freaking out!!

I have been taking these home pregnancy test. I took another first response and got a negative.  My fears have come true. This is what I have been scared of!! I have six positive test. Three negatives and I feel like my period might be coming. I am so sad. I need a confirmation one way or another. I haven’t seen my period yet but my sad face is on today.

I am going to wait and see if my period will show up soon. I swear all this positive and negative sucks big time!!!